Welcome back! And if you’re a college freshman—welcome to Athens. And I mean that with all sincerity. I never thought I’d reach a place of peace with being a local in a college town, but I just had to accept that I can’t change anyone’s actions or thoughts but my own. It’s up to me to create the life I want, and I can’t expect giant sea-changes in others’ behavior just because I don’t like it. We all know it’s close to impossible for a single person to change a system, but we can most certainly change our own circumstances.
I hate how long it took me to understand that. When I was in undergrad, I worked for the university newspaper at a tiny, tiny school where my department only had one full-time faculty member. Just trust me when I say that this guy was not great. I confronted him about his snakey ways after some super unacceptable shit went down, and somehow he “forgot” about my final paycheck at the end of the semester. I went to the dean of arts and sciences to see if they could process my paycheck, and he told me to my face that he did not believe that this paltry sum was really that important and that I was essentially being greedy by expecting to be paid at all.
I was a columnist back then just like I am now, and I had not endeared myself to the university administration at all. I sat in that office hungry and broke and trying to convince a man in a suit that I needed the roughly $300 I was owed so that I could eat and pay my rent. That’s when the dean decided to answer a question I didn’t ask at all by telling me how I needed to suck it up and eat rice until the start of the fall semester, when other administrators would be available to process my pay. He didn’t disagree that I was owed this money, but he certainly didn’t believe me when I said it was the only money I had or that I needed it to survive.
I knew that all of these people worked in the interest of the university, but I thought that included being supportive of students and being fair to student workers (ha ha). Maybe the dean knew that my pay would have to wait for someone to return for the fall semester, but he couldn’t resist an opportunity to knock an uppity writer down a peg or three. He couldn’t just say that there was nothing to be done until August—he just had to tell me how much I didn’t deserve my pay and gaslight me about my poverty. I left that office defeated and, frankly, I have no idea how I made it to August. I have no memory of it. Must have just blocked it out.
Don’t be a Baby Bonita and give up on yourself. I honestly don’t think that the goal was to insult me, but those who lack empathy will use any tool they can to get what they want, even if it’s just shutting up a broke student who’s missing a paycheck. Really though, I should have just switched majors to a department with enough faculty and administration to manage situations like unfinished paperwork. I knew I was not in a good place. I could still be a writer without a journalism degree! I should have just changed my major.
I share this cautionary tale because I want you all to do what I couldn’t, which is to report bad behavior from faculty, advocate for yourself, and change your major if you want. Success in college requires a nurturing educational environment helmed by people who want their students to succeed. That alone will make all the difference in your college experience, and in your success after you leave. Don’t take any guff from these swine, and drink plenty of water on game day. You deserve to have fun, but you’re also here to succeed. Don’t let anyone keep you from succeeding, including the university itself.
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