Let's hear it for the boy! Yessiree-bob, I'm back at ya with another load of horse hockey that could change your life. Full prescriptions available below.

Next, We Hose 'Em Down: Athens rockers Zumm Zumm absolutely rocked The Ultramod Compound on April 19. Just back from their most recent U.S. tour, with song-meister Madeline tagging along, the guys played a seamless show to a small but overwhelmingly enthusiastic crowd. While I will never ever endorse the let's-cover-ourselves-in-as-much-filth-and-body-odor-as-possible aesthetic of the band and most of its fans, I can say that Zumm Zumm is following grandly in the path of the great 1980's peace-punk bands like Flux Of Pink Indians, Conflict and The Subhumans (the U.K. band, not the Canadian one). Not so much in sound, but in style, substance and passion.

What's Plan B?: Local promoter/organizer Christina Saas has expressed her pleasure at the good showing by Sci Fu, The Good Ship, Stories Below and Red Leader at the anti-war concert she promoted at the fabulous 40 Watt back on April 7. A lot of money was raised and handed out to groups like Amnesty International, Doubts About War and the Athens Green Party. While the event failed to stop U.S. intervention in Iraq, they were obviously trying their hardest. Saas is planning to hold other events of this type and if your band or organization wants to get in on the action and participate contacts Saas at 540-4178 or csaas@mindspring.com.

Music For Films: Erik Hinds and Solponticello Records are gonna bust a musical cap in Eminem's ass with this news. Production company Haxan Films has chosen music from the Solponticello catalog to pepper their newest film @lien. The lucky punters are Hinds himself, Julie Powell, The Georgian Contemporary Unit, Kyle Dawkins and Dromedary. While it's not certain that the music will make it into the final version of the film, we do know that when the film is shown at festivals Solponticello music will be featured. Good showing, guys.

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Get There Early This Time: R.E.M. is making it well worth your while to arrive early at their shows on their North American tour this coming fall. Focusing on solid songwriters rather than mere pop flavors, fans will get to enjoy Sparklehorse, Pete Yorn, Wilco and Ed Harcourt. Too bad ya only get one of them at each show. Atlanta area fans (that's us) will be treated to an opening set by Yorn who, while tending to play the exact same set too many nights in a row, is blowing down crowds east to west nowadays. R.E.M. gunslinger Peter Buck is featured on Yorn's newest Columbia Records album Day I Forgot.

Big Ballers: Athens' own Widespread Panic, while never waning in popularity, is in high gear with the new album Ball just released on April 15. The band appeared at the legendary (around since 1971!) Looney Tunes record shop on New York's Long Island April 21 and fans that were savvy enough to have pre-ordered the CD got to do a meet-and-greet with the band, get autographs and go home happy. The same type of thing goes down over the U.S. all the time, but with much lesser personalities. Love 'em or hate 'em, no one can ever say that the guys in Panic aren't about the nicest band members one is likely to ever meet. For the fans that can get over their THC-induced short-term memory loss, mark you calendars for June 12 when they will appear again on David Letterman's stage.

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I Say It And It Comes True: A couple of weeks ago I wished for a live bill combining the fuzz-pop sounds of The High Caliber along with the short-sharp-shock of The Shut-Ups. Well, Murphy Wolford and Nick Bielli over at Tasty World have fulfilled this desire and the whole thing will go down May 16. (Athens' Fairburn Royals will round out the bill.) People, I'm telling you, you gotta see these guys. Even if neither band gets rich and famous, they will still have to be remembered as two of the best bands in town, circa 2003.

Segue Away: Now that we've mentioned Fairburn Royals once, we've got free license to do it over and over and over again. The guys are hitching a ride onto the information superhighway (yes, we still call it that - so?) and distributing a new, free EP through their Web site. Well, new-ish, anyway. The EP is an Internet-only release that features four exclusive versions of old songs that have appeared on the Royals' two albums The Sunshine Slowdown and From a Window Way Above. Get in on the action and download cover art as well at www.fairburnroyals.com. [Chris Hassiotis]

Spell's Broken: So more-than-just-jazz-singer Nina Simone passed away Monday, April 21, in France. The talented 70-year-old vocalist proved with her version of "I Put a Spell On You" that Screamin' Jay Hawkins could be topped. Her "I Got it Bad (And That Ain't Good)" is just about one of the best love songs out there. Let Flagpole be the first to suggest an Athens tribute to Nina Simone: let's get some of this town's talented singers together - how about Hope For Agoldensummer's Claire Campbell and Jucifer's Amber Valentine, or Sara O'Brien or Solponticello Record's Julie Powell, all together in one big Nina-centric night? Just an idea, folks. [CH]

Radio Free Athens: WUGA 91.7 FM and 97.9 FM debuts "Songsmiths," a new series focusing on local songwriters, this week. The format's a cool one, too: you'll get a different host for each hour-long show - singer/songwriter Jack Logan will interview Patterson Hood of The Drive-By Truckers, Jason Slatton will interview Vigilantes of Love's Bill Mallonee and producer David Barbe will interview The Indigo Girls. The show debuts Saturday, May 3 at 1 p.m., and runs every other week at that same time, alternating with JoE Silva's look at Athens' eclectic musical acts "Just Off the Radar." [CH]

Show us Your Riffs: Playboy.com, that mirror of public opinion, is running a contest over on their Web site to determine who the "sexiest babe of indie rock" is. Amber Valentine, singer and guitar destroyer for Jucifer, is in the running, and it's a crazy race - the first day the poll was up, Amber was healthily in the lead, but now she's facing stiff competition from Neko Case and Cat Power's Chan Marshall. Playboy.com says they'll ask the winner (announced in mid-May) to pose nude for the magazine, though Amber's publicist Michelle Roche says that we won't see Athens' favorite metalista nekkid even if she does win. Ignore the stupid "she's a woman who can rock better than a man, if you can believe it" attitude and help preserve democracy at www.playboy.com/sex/features/indierock/. [CH]

Don't Vote? Don't Bitch: What, Gordon's the only one in town who gets to say what's good and what's better? Now you can, too, with the 2003 Flagpole Athens Music Awards. Our multiple categories allow you to give the thumbs-up to singer/songwriters, rock bands, pop groups, albums and more. Check out the ballot on p. 36 or vote on-line at www.flagpole.com. The show kicks off AthFest on June 19 at the Morton Theatre with live music and hilarious antics on- and off-stage. All ballots are due June 2, so get cracking. [CH]

And that's it for this week guys. Get yer news in early and often. If you don't have any news, then create some. Remember: I'm your biggest fan. Do the Funky Chicken via email to music@flagpole.com, voicemail at 549-2360; via fax at 548-8981; or by post at P.O. Box 1027, Athens, GA 30603.

Gordon Lamb