Yes, I'm back in action this week after being unduly delayed and rendered impotent by the information superhighway. Well, that and the fact that I was kidnapped by Knight Seeker after giving up an absolutely horrendous version of "Ace Of Spades" on Halloween. At any rate, let me tell you some stuff...

Another Good One Comes Around: Athens rock band Coulier has been shaking more than house shows lately. Recently Coulier shared the stage with Fake Red Seth for the latter's final show over at The Caledonia Lounge. Also the band blew out a few watts over at WUOG 90.5 FM during a "Live In The Lobby" performance. The band has recently completed its upcoming split CD with Marietta band Bender and is also having its debut 7" released by Atlanta good guys Stick Figure Distro in December. If you head over to www.coulier.net, you can download a couple of videos and the MP3 for "Chicken Fingers And Grindcore" which is much more melodic, mid-'90s punk than the name would suggest.

The Hip Keep On Hoppin': I seriously have no idea how to encourage y'all to get out there and experience hip hop in Athens. I know some of you won't ever be converted and, indeed, it took me a while to come around also. However, once my eyes were opened, there was no looking back.

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Maybe some of you caught the recent Herb And Skills show over at Nuçi's Space sponsored by Attica Sound and Dreaded Mindz. If you're in the mood for some good stuff later this month, get yourself over to the 40 Watt on November 14 for Aesop Rock/Mr. Lif/C-Rayz Walz/DJ Fakts One or on November 24 and check out the Jomo Entertainment-promoted show by Detroit-based funk/R&B/hip hop masters Slum Village. Sure, they're not local, but a show like this would be a perfect intro for all you waiting to get your feet wet. But later this month you'll have the Dreaded Mindz's third annual "King of the Ring" competition. Sixteen local MCs, four rounds, all on November 21 at UGA's Tate Center Georgia Hall.

And Now, A Segue: So speaking of the local hip hop scene, how's this? Friday, Nov. 14, at 10 p.m., head over to Insomnia. Attica Sound, Dreaded Mindz and Interscope Records (!) will host a party premiering Showtime's new series "The Next Episode." According to Attica owner/producer Jorma Starratt, the show "is basically a reality series about up-and-coming battle rappers across the country. They made a stop in Atlanta in August and did quite a few shots with Ishues and Fort Knox doing their thing." Speaking of Ishues, he and the Greasekydz will perform at the event; also, Ishues finally has a date for the release of his solo record Reality Flow. Twenty-two tracks, 78 minutes - January 27 can't come soon enough, and word is that Interscope's expressed interest in releasing the record. Pretty impressive - but you already knew that if you've seen the man in action. [Chris Hassiotis]

Kinda Makes Your Job Look Like Crap, Huh?: It might seem like the life of an Athens rocker is full of cute girls, fistfuls of cash and an endless supply of bed buddies, but it's just not so folks.

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Case in point: Jet By Day's current tour across the States. After planning the tour for months, their booking agent suddenly up and disappeared, leaving the band high and dry. All was not lost, however, as the band was able to complete three weeks of touring with fellow Athenians Jucifer. Then the nimble-fingered/ Internet-savvy guys hopped on-line and were able to start booking shows left and right with ex-Braid rockers Hey Mercedes. The band also was able to complete an interview and photo shoot with MAGNET which is slated to appear sometime in January. And, of course, the band's showcase at CMJ in New York was a hands-down success. Wait a second... I take it all back. The life of an Athens rocker is nothing but cake and frosting.

Brokedown: The new album from local heavy rock outfit Another Broken Vehicle is ready for human consumption. Featuring nine songs, the album was recorded at Butterbean Studios and is available at the band's website (anotherbrokenvehicle.com) as well as at this week's Tasty World show with Calico System and The Knife Trade on November 12. Speaking of the band's website, you can also drop by to watch videos of recent performances (the IHOC show is particularly rowdy) and listen to the band's punk-inspired metal songs. [Chris Hassiotis]

Nor Exactly Art and Not Exactly Not: In hopes of saving yet another show from being performed in front of two people and a doorman, let me encourage all of you to head out to The Caledonia on November 14 and catch El Guapo and Xiu Xiu. El Guapo - "The Handsome," for you non-hispanohablantes - has been kicking around the Washington, DC, area for about seven years now. Originally just a duo, they added a third in 2000 to bolster their post-hardcore roar and hooked up with Dischord Records just last year. The band has managed to make a small name for itself even though it has yet to really release anything and plays only the most sporadic schedule known to man. Xiu Xiu, currently touring behind its newest EP Fag Patrol, has been compared, more or less successfully, to Joy Division and most other dark, introspective rock music. But, dammit, the band's sound is a whole lot more disjointed than that. Definitely dark sounding, but I've enjoyed Xiu Xiu quite a bit so what does that say about me? All in all, the show will be artsy enough for the art-school crowd and rocking enough for the rock-scene crowd. Which is exactly like Joy Division. Which means I was wrong. Damn.

Meanwhile Back In The Lab: The crowd over at Skylab Audio (Eric Friar and Asa Leffer) recently moved the control room of the studio downstairs to the main floor in order to make room for their new Ampex M1100 2-inch/16-track reel-to-reel machine. What this means is that bands will still get the incredible rate of only $20.00 an hour while being able to lay tracks down on an incredible machine at the same time. In other Skylab news, Leffer has been working with Hunter-Gatherer side-project Let's Surf and Friar has finished the newest Sharks And Minnows album. Contact these guys if you're interested in some great work done at more than a reasonable cost, www.skylabaudio.com.

Local Lyrics Just Keep On Coming: Back in the early 1990s, Athens was blessed to have yet another great songwriter taking up temporary residence here in town. The man in question was ex-Hüsker Dü frontman Bob Mould and by virtue of the fact that his then-band Sugar was pretty much based out of Athens and featured longtime-Athenian David Barbe on bass, I feel really comfortable quoting him in this section. Here's another heart-tugger from me to you courtesy of the track "Fortune Teller" off of Sugar's 1992 debut Copper Blue: "A part of me stands confused again/ Watching it slip right/ Through my hands/ Put a finger on it now before it's gone."

And so much for all that. As always, keep the news coming in and as always give a reference to either me or Threats & Promises in your email subject line. Bury magnets, swallow the rapture via email to music@flagpole.com, voicemail at 549-2360; via fax at 548-8981; or by post at P.O. Box 1027, Athens, GA 30603.

Gordon Lamb