originally published February 14, 2007

BECAUSE I SAID SO

(PG-13) You can call this flick Demeaning Diane, considering Diane Keaton, one of Hollywood’s grandest dames, had to endure two cakes in the face, two Internet sex searches, laryngitis-induced tomfoolery, and a squeamish fake orgasm with Rev. Cam of “7th Heaven.” Keaton is 60-year-old single mom Daphne, who wants so badly to see her youngest, Milly (Mandy Moore), find happiness. Because I Said So’s wasting of Keaton’s immense talents is more than disappointing; it’s heartbreaking. (Beechwood, Carmike)

BREACH

(PG-13) Based on the true story of the greatest security breach in U.S. history, Breach traces the career of young FBI agent Eric O’Neill (Ryan Phillippe) after he is handpicked by agent Robert Hanssen (Oscar winner Chris Cooper). Flightplan screenwriter Billy Ray’s follow-up to his well-received directorial debut, Shattered Glass, sports one terrific trailer. With Laura Linney. Opens Friday (Beechwood, Carmike)

BRIDGE TO TEREBITHIA

(PG) Will the Walden Media production please those who grew up on Katherine Paterson’s 1978 Newbury Award winning book about two bullied preteens creating a magical kingdom as a means of escaping reality? Also starring Zooey Deschanel and Robert Patrick. Opens Friday (Beechwood, Carmike)

CASINO ROYALE

(PG-13) How well does new 007 Daniel Craig wear the famed tux? Pretty damn well. Chronicling Bond’s first assignment as a Double O, Casino Royale charts very highly, and so does its new Bond. I don’t know where the Bond franchise is headed, but I do know nobody’s done it better than Casino Royale and Daniel Craig in a long, long time. Starts Friday (Georgia Square 5)

CATCH AND RELEASE

(PG-13) Why Susannah Grant, the Oscar-winning screenwriter of Erin Brockovich, chose to make her directorial debut with this distasteful romantic comedy about a woman dealing with the death of her lying, cheating fiancé is beyond me. As Gray Wheeler, Jennifer Garner (“Alias”) wheels from manic to depressive as she deals with dead fiancé Grady’s hideous mother (Fiona Shaw) and not-quite-a-cad best friend Fritz (Timothy Olyphant, “Deadwood”). Ends Thursday (Beechwood)

CHILDREN OF MEN

(R) Prophetic filmmaker Alfonso Cuarón conjures the immensely sad weight of a hopeless world without children in his nightmarish yet agile Children of Men. In 2027, humanity is infertile and has been for 18 years before Theo Faron (Clive Owen, radiating world-weary humor and reluctant heroism) is tasked with protecting a pregnant illegal teen called Kee (Clare-Hope Ashitey). The breathtaking Children adds several intelligent counterpoints to the post-apocalyptic filmic conversation. A rare example of smart, sharp filmmaking. Ends Thursday (Carmike)

DADDY’S LITTLE GIRLS

(PG-13) I’m skeptical of Tyler Perry’s newest. Though Perry wrote and directed Daddy’s Little Girls, he does not appear as the madcap matriarch. Instead, Daddy’s Little Girls concerns itself with the romance between a wealthy young attorney (Gabrielle Union) and a blue collar, single father of three (Idris Elba). With Oscar winner Louis Gossett Jr. and Tracee Ellis Ross of “Girlfriends.” Opens Friday (Beechwood, Carmike)

DÉJÀ VU

(PG-13) This sci fi/ action/ romance is never as tricky as it thinks it is, but it’s not a bad way to spend an evening, either. ATF agent Doug Carlin (Denzel Washington) joins a top secret government task force, led by Val Kilmer, to stop the explosion he’s currently investigating from ever happening. Ends Thursday (Georgia Square 5)

THE DEPARTED

(R) Adapted from the Hong Kong actioner Infernal Affairs, The Departed straddles the law with the parallel lives of mob mole Colin Sullivan (Matt Damon) and police rat Billy Costigan (Leonardo DiCaprio). Though Colin and Billy’s intense game of rat-and-mouse dominates the film, Jack Nicholson rules it. Intelligent and taut, The Departed is Martin Scorsese’s most purely entertaining film. Nominated for five Academy Awards. (Georgia Square 5)

DREAMGIRLS

(PG-13) Glitzy and glamorous, the Golden Globe-winning Dreamgirls, chronicling the Supremes-like rise of Deena (Beyoncé Knowles), Effie (“American Idol” finalist Jennifer Hudson), and Lorrell (Anika Noni Rose), never shies away from its Broadway roots. Writer-director Bill Condon’s script is near perfect, but no one would notice were it not for the cast. Jamie Foxx and Knowles are good, but it's Eddie Murphy and Hudson who earned their Golden Globes. The former Beverly Hills Cop delivers an Academy-approved, showy performance from a diminished star, and though newcomer Hudson’s acting may be a bit rough, her booming voice drums out such thoughts. Dreamgirls has both the rhythm and the blues. Nominated for eight Academy Awards. Ends Thursday (Beechwood, Carmike)

EPIC MOVIE

(PG-13) Epic Movie is a new pile of stinking poo that stinks of everything but the sweat of actual hard, creative labor. A game cast can’t find a single laugh in these blunt stabs at The Chronicles of Narnia, Snakes on a Plane and Harry Potter. Wasted is impersonation impresario Darrell Hammonds’ Johnny Depp as Jack Sparrow. Hammonds’ mimicry is so brilliant it’s blinding amidst the rest of this myopic muck masquerading as merriment. This crap’s not amusing; it’s depressing. Ends Thursday (Beechwood, Carmike); Shows Friday, 2/16–Sunday, 2/18 (Highway 17 Theatres)

ERAGON

(PG) I can’t remember watching a movie so disrespectful of its source material, the bestselling novel by Christopher Paolini. Eragon (Edward Speleers), an orphaned farm boy, discovers he’s destined for greatness as the last Dragon Rider. What was innocent awe on paper is hokey on celluloid. Ends Thursday (Georgia Square 5)

FACTORY GIRL

(R) This biopic of Andy Warhol muse Edie Sedgwick (Sienna Miller, Layer Cake), the college dropout who became a '60s "It Girl" before her death by overdose, has been hounded by controversy ever since Bob Dylan got legally riled over the composite character Billy Quinn (Hayden Christensen). Supposedly, Guy Pearce’s Warhol is quite the crowd-pleaser. (Following on the heels of Basquiat’s David Bowie and I Shot Andy Warhol’s Jared Harris, that must mean Pearce is pretty good.) With Jimmy Fallon, Illeana Douglas and Mena Suvari. Directed by Emmy winner George Hickenlooper (Dogtown, Mayor of the Sunset Strip). Opens Friday (Beechwood)

FLUSHED AWAY

(PG) Expecting Aardman Animations’ first fully-CGI feature to be as good as Wallace and Gromit is unfair, it's still better than most cartoons, though. After being flushed from his plush home, “society mouse” Roddy (v. Hugh Jackman) enters an under-London world, which he and pal Rita (v. Kate Winslet) battle the villainous Toad (v. Ian McKellan). (Georgia Square 5)

GHOST RIDER

(PG-13) Ghost Rider, Marvel Comics’ second tier vengeful spirit with a flaming skull, had a triumphant rebirth during my most formative comics heyday. Unfortunately, that renaissance has left me with a soft spot for Johnny Blaze even if the stunt cyclist whose deal with the devil calls for him to literally become Hell on wheels is played by the increasingly grating Nicolas Cage. Why any producer would hire Mark Steven Johnson, the man who ruined Daredevil’s big screen debut, to helm another comic-to-screen transition is anybody’s guess. Also starring Eva Mendes, Sam Elliott, Donal Logue and Peter Fonda as Mephistopheles. Opens Friday (Beechwood, Carmike); Shows Friday, 2/16–Sunday, 2/18 (Highway 17 Theatres)

THE GOOD SHEPHERD

(R) Robert De Niro must have been paying attention on set with legendary directors Martin Scorsese and Francis Ford Coppola. The famed actor’s Good Shepherd, a shadowy look at the beginnings of the C.I.A., is the best Cold War-era spy movie in years, and the best gangster movie since Goodfellas. Starring Matt Damon. Starts Friday (Georgia Square 5)

HANNIBAL RISING

(R) See Movie Pick and Flick Skinny. (Beechwood, Carmike); Shows Friday, 2/16–Sunday, 2/18 (Highway 17 Theatres)

HAPPY FEET

(PG) Mumble the penguin (voiced by Elijah Wood) takes an eye-popping, breathtaking journey from dropped egg to societal savior. Happy Feet taps out a fresh rhythm to which you can dance when it’s not delivering pat lessons on religious intolerance and environmental destruction. Not until the Amigos appear, led by the infectious Ramon (Robin Williams), does this cold film thaw somewhat. Thinking visually, the musically gifted Happy Feet fails to act narratively. Shows Friday, 2/16–Sunday, 2/18 (Tate)

THE HOLIDAY

(PG-13) Cameron Diaz, Jude Law, Kate Winslet and Jack Black discover that ideal movie love while clad in expensive duds and romping through gorgeous homes. Holiday reminds us Hollywood still has some romantic magic left. Ends Thursday (Georgia Square 5)

THE LAST SIN EATER

(PG-13) Directed by Michael Landon Jr. from the bestseller by Francine Rivers, The Last Sin Eater is the latest Christian-themed release from FoxFaith Movies, a distribution arm of Twentieth Century Fox, a subsidiary of Rupert Murdoch’s NewsCorp (just wanted to make sure you knew). In 1850s Appalachia, 10-year-old Cadi Forbes (Liana Liberato), feeling responsible for the death of her little sister, seeks out her town’s Sin Eater (Soren Fulton), a mythical figure who can absolve a person of their transgressions by literally devouring them (the intriguing concept figured in Brian Helgeland’s disappointing The Order starring Heath Ledger). Before you can say “only Christ can forgive sins,” Cadi has brought the truth of Jesus to a community committed to their pagan rite. For name recognition, Academy Award winner Louise Fletcher appears as mysterious Miz Elda, and Henry Thomas shows up on the back nine as a traveling Man of God. I have nothing against the creation and release of movies targeted at a particular audience, but until FoxFaith stops bilking folks of their hard-earned eight bucks with made-for-TV quality, Hallmark Hall of Fame flicks, I refuse to acknowledge their high-minded profession of purpose. (Carmike)

LETTERS FROM IWO JIMA

(R) Clint Eastwood’s Japanese-language accompaniment to last October’s Flags of Our Fathers has already won numerous film awards, including the Golden Globe for Best Foreign Language Film, and is nominated for four Oscars. Starring Ken Watanabe, Letters ponders the Battle of Iwo Jima from the Japanese perspective. Opens Friday (Carmike)

LOOK AT ME

(PG-13) 2004. The sixth annual University of Georgia French Film Festival continues with Comme une image. Gifted with a lovely voice, Lolita (Marilou Berry) must defeat her own self-image demons while seeking a foothold in her celebrity father’s world. Director Agnès Jaoui and writing partner Jean-Pierre Bacri received the Best Screenplay Award at Cannes. Each of the festival selections will be introduced by Dr. Richard Neupert. Sponsored by UGA Cinematic Arts and the Department of Theatre and Film Studies. Shows Monday, 2/19 (Tate)

THE MESSENGERS

(PG-13) The Pang Brothers, Danny and Oxide, made their mark on Japanese horror back in 2002 with The Eye. Now they’ve come to Hollywood with The Messengers, an obvious yet foreboding ghost story. The Solomons (including Dylan McDermott, Penelope Ann Miller, and Kristen Stewart) have just moved to North Dakota to escape cinematic familial drama. The idyllic escape doesn’t last long as teenage daughter Jess (Stewart) begins sensing the creepiness that lurks inside the most clearly haunted house ever. Her apparently clueless parents then hire a weird nomadic guy with a gun (John Corbett) to help harvest their picturesque sunflower crop. Messengers’ nonsensical goings-on lead to genuinely terrifying scenes (I’ll never carry a baby down a dark hallway the same way again) when the brothers smartly allow the audience to imagine the horror waiting just outside of the light. But with its limp climactic twist, the flick finishes most unsatisfyingly. Still, for about an hour there, Hollywood properly translates the illogical, scary language of J-horror. (Beechwood, Carmike)

MOJADOS: THROUGH THE NIGHT

(NR) 2004. Going five for five on the southwest film festival circuit, Mojados delivers a first-person look into illegal border crossing. Director Tommy Davis follows a family on the dangerous 120-mile trek from their small Mexican village, risking dehydration, hypothermia, and discovery by the Border Patrol, in pursuit of a better life in the United States. Mojados is a true tour de force by Davis, who wrote, directed, produced, shot, edited and narrated the film. Mojados will be accompanied by a discussion led by John Chamblee. Sponsored by the Latin American and Caribbean Studies Institute. Shows Wednesday, 2/21 (UGA SLC)

MUSIC & LYRICS

(PG-13) Maybe I like Hugh Grant a bit too much. Why else would I be so excited about a toothless romantic comedy starring Grant and Drew Barrymore as songwriting collaborators who fall in love while writing a hit song for a Britney-wannabe? Still, the sight of Grant as the member of a Wham-lite '80s band brings joy to my overworked critical brain. Written and directed by Two Weeks Notice’s Marc Lawrence. With Brad Garrett and Kristen Johnston. Opens Friday (Beechwood, Carmike)

A NIGHT AT THE MUSEUM

(PG) Though I don’t blame Ben Stiller for taking the lucrative family film route, Night at the Museum, a barely amusing romp due in large part to everyone but its star, showcases the comedian in all his childish unlikability. After taking a job as a night guard at the Museum of Natural History, he discovers the displays come to life when the sun goes down. Starts Friday (Georgia Square 5)

NORBIT

(PG-13) I feel calling Norbit, Eddie Murphy’s latest latex-heavy, joke-light comedy, a live-action cartoon is insulting to cartoons everywhere; some of my best friends are toons. Applying the same Nutty Professor formula - impressive effects by Rick Baker (six-time Academy Award winner for Best Makeup), language and humor just below R-rated, family-unfriendly radar - will probably supply Murphy with his biggest non-Shrek hit since that other mean-spirited flick constructed completely out of fat jokes, the awful Klumps. Nice guy Norbit (Murphy) is married to Rasputia (Murphy again), a large woman as hideous on the outside as she is within. When Norbit’s soul mate, former orphan Kate (Thandie Newton), returns, the mild-mannered nebbish must find a backbone and fight for his and Kate’s happiness. I could have blindly scripted Norbit’s entire dramatic arc with 90-percent accuracy; the story by Murphy and his brother Charlie is that prescribed, and that’s before addressing the intensely stereotypical caricatures, like Mr. Wong (Murphy times three), a Chinese restaurateur who never met an “l” he couldn’t replace with an “r.” After watching Murphy regain his respect with the detoxifying Dreamgirls, it’s sad to see him slumming again so soon. (Beechwood, Carmike)

NOTES ON A SCANDAL

(R) The titular scandal involves new art teacher Sheba Hart (Oscar nominee Cate Blanchett), whose affair with a 15-year-old student is meticulously detailed in the notes kept by ancient history teacher Barbara Covett (Oscar nominee Judi Dench). Notes really has three stars, and Dame Judi is the only traditional one of the bunch. Patrick Marber’s Oscar-nominated adaptation of Zoe Heller’s novel is as delightfully twisted a piece of work as Closer. He amuses with puckish adjectives and cynical nettles that narrator Barbara twists deeper and deeper until they can’t be removed without furthering the damage. Barbara, whose obsession is at once Sapphic, platonic and dangerous, is like a desiccated Tom Ripley. So, Notes provides us with no one to pull for. The third star of Richard Eyre’s film is the Oscar-nominated score, another instant classic by Philip Glass (The Hours). Notes on a Scandal is one mesmerizing, creepy thriller. Ends Thursday (Beechwood)

OFF THE BLACK

(R) With the amateurishness of reality, Off the Black meanders through the small town lives of Dave Tibbel (Trevor Morgan) and Ray Cook (Nick Nolte), both forever changed by a close call made behind the plate of a high school baseball game. Writer-director James Ponsoldt, a Cedar Shoals graduate, pulls off a pretty impressive trick in his first feature. He crafts a personal, unobtrusive study of the fragile, transferable ties of family. Off the Black may not be the perfect pitch, but it’s close enough to warrant a swing. Ends Thursday (Beechwood)

THE PAINTED VEIL

(PG-13) 2006 should be known as the Year of the Score. When Golden Globe-winning Alexandre Desplat’s haunting, piano-driven elegy to love in the time of cholera can’t even nab an Oscar nomination, the competition must be tight. Everything that visibly accompanies this adaptation of W. Somerset Maugham’s novel of passive-aggressive love - a young doctor (Edward Norton, who is so consistently good it’s suspicious) punishes the infidelity of his wife (Naomi Watts) with a trip to rural, infected China - is up to standard period piece specs. We’re not talking Merchant Ivory here, but Veil is a solid literary construction. Norton and Watts deliver performances rife with repressed emotion, pained longing and brief bursts of passion. Though Veil gets weirdly romcom-y in its second act, director John Curran and screenwriter Ron Nyswaner pull you back in with a cholera- and revolution-packed final act. (Beechwood); Ends Thursday (Carmike)

PAN'S LABYRINTH

(R) In Pan’s Labyrinth, the Spanish Civil War means to slice youth from out the gullet, a war crime Guillermo del Toro’s gothic fairy tale can only delay but not deny. Young Ofelia (Ivana Baquero) discovers an old stone labyrinth and a faun who asks of her three tasks. The adventures of Ofelia - a Spanish Alice in a terrifying Wonderland, a desperate Dorothy escaping war-torn Kansas for a darkened Oz - have all the tropes of fantasy fiction, but the magic realism causes the little girl’s success to mean so very much to her and the audience. The not-remotely-for-children film broke my heart. As a writer, del Toro has matured well beyond his previous efforts, all under-served somewhat by his structure, pacing and characterizations. I’m at the end of the line for doling out post-2006 best of accolades, but I would be remiss not to include Pan’s Labyrinth, the greatest fantasy film in quite some time. Nominated for six Academy Awards. (Beechwood)

PEACEABLE KINGDOM

(NR) 2004. Director Jenny Stein (The Witness) peeks inside the picturesque red barn door of farming to see the black soul of modern factory farming. Peaceable Kingdom won the Ojai Film Festival’s Festival Theme Award. The screening includes a discussion led by Michael Ramirez. The film is part of the 2nd Annual Film Festival on Animals and Society, sponsored by UGA’s Speak Out for Species. Visit www.uga.edu/sos/filmfest. Shows Monday, 2/19 (UGA SLC)

THE QUEEN

(PG-13) The Queen is a royal “West Wing,” allowing a glimpse behind the throne. Golden Globe winner Helen Mirren brings all her graceful control and ice-cold radiance to a Royal Majesty bungling the sudden death of constant thorn in her crown, Diana. Peter Morgan’s screenplay posits what transpired in the private chambers of the monarchy with a deftly light comic touch that detracts nothing from its dark gravity. Nominated for six Academy Awards. Ends Thursday (Beechwood)

A SIMPLE CURVE

(NR) This Canadian film tells the story of 27-year-old Caleb, who, after being raised in the mountains by his back-to-the-land hippie parents, is determined to make money and be successful. Shows Thursday, 2/15 (ACC Library)

SMOKIN’ ACES

(R) Joe Carnahan’s hipped out return to the big screen doesn’t measure up. When Las Vegas entertainer/ wannabe Mafioso Buddy “Aces” Israel (Jeremy Piven) turns stoolie, a million-dollar bounty is placed on his head and a bevy of contract killers descend on the Reno suite where Israel is holed up. Carnahan's dialogue is crisp and witty, and he clearly and amazingly gets his many plot plates spinning with at least a half-dozen narrators. Sadly, Carnahan mistakenly believes he’s made us care for his cut and paste stereotypes. Still, Aces is a decent enough hand to win your money back. (Carmike); Ends Thursday (Beechwood)

SPIRITED AWAY

(PG) 2001. Hayao Miyazaki’s Academy Award winner for Best Animated Feature constantly crops up in the blogged recommendations of any hip fan of mature cartoons (and I don’t mean mature like Fritz the Cat). While moving to the suburbs with her family, 10-year-old Chihiro discovers a strange new world filled with gods and spirits where she must labor to find the means to return the original world. Winner of 35 international film awards. Shows Thursday, 2/15 (Tate)

STOMP THE YARD

(PG-13) Stomp the Yard follows DJ (Columbus Short) from underground street dancing in L.A. to the beautiful campuses of the Atlanta University Center. A talented dancer, DJ soon finds rival fraternities fighting over his skills to ensure a victory at the national step show competition. Stomp the Yard may just be a good old competition movie, but the choreography’s fly and the surrounding melodrama not out of step. Ends Thursday (Carmike)

WE ARE MARSHALL

(PG) Allowing McG (Charlie’s Angels and Charlie’s Angels: Full Throttle) to bring the greatest tragedy in college sports history - the 1970 plane crash that killed 75 Marshall football players, coaches and fans - is like letting Michael Bay tackle Pearl Harbor. (We saw how well that turned out.) Mini-Bay McG gets the football right, but the musky We Are Marshall stinks of cheap sentimentality. The cast is great, though. Starts Friday (Georgia Square 5)